Change

Well, it has been a while since I have posted here. Yes WE are still plugging along. I am going to talk about something that is extremely difficult for me. Change. Change is scary and hard. It takes effort. Sometimes I stay in my spot for too long, because it is known. Maybe it isn’t exactly comfortable, but it is what I know that keeps me stagnant. I know that if I make changes, it will have to grow, not only as a person but emotionally and this may affect others. Do I want to affect others? No. I want to do what is right for everyone else, but not for me. My self care and self awareness is lacking. Yes I know this. But, does it change the fact that If I choose different, that it will be hard? No. I need to better me. I need to grow. I need to look out for me. No one else will do it for me. I realize this now.

Do you ever just know that you are not doing what your are supposed to do to maintain your own personal health and growth? I think we all stay stagnant sometimes in our daily routines. So here I am, fighting change, fighting growth, because I know that others will have to change too. How do I ask this of them? Well, I cannot continue this journey of unhealthy boundaries. I cannot just let myself go by the wayside. So here I go….bravery…here I go growth…here I go…making changes.